Written by Raney-Mills Turner, LPC, ATR
What comes after the excessive creativity, costuming, king cake, and community? Whether
you were an active participant or a purposeful hideaway, the energy of the city
dramatically shifts on Ash Wednesday. Some call it the post-Mardi Gras blues, others – the
Lenten Season, while others – a whole new year experience, chock full of fresh intentions.
A Chinese medicine colleague told me many moons ago that it was a useless capitalist hoax
to set goals and resolutions in January. We must hibernate in the winter, as most mammals
do, and come alive again with the sprouting spring plants, the green of the trees, the
budding flowers of March. The energy vibrates higher when we align with our
environment. All becomes one.
Are you standing strong in mountain pose, heart-forward for what is next? Or are you
finding yourself in a heavier version of restorative yoga on the flattest surface you can find?
How are you doing when you check in with your Center? Are you able to connect with
Divine guidance?
As a therapist, the post-Mardi Gras uptick of referrals is fascinating. New folks, returning
clients from years past, and current clients with new ideas about themselves all come
shuffling in. People often show up in my office after Mardi Gras with mini revelations about
their beliefs, values, and past selves, asking me how to integrate these parts on an
energetic level. Sometimes, this new personal information comes at the cost of an initial
shame cycle due to facing a darker part of oneself during the season. Other times, a person
arrives like a fresh tulip, and I am there to bear witness to the rapid, almost-manic, opening
of the flower.
Costuming is an excellent way to explore one’s internal psyche. For many years, I have
been a winged being. The dark-winged raven I became in Mardi Gras 2023 turned out to be
a subconscious choice to kill off a part of myself I did not like. This year, I chose to be Babe
the Blue Ox, Paul Bunyan’s sidekick. This was intentionally meant for extra grounding,
strength, “hooves on the earth.” In self-discovery, our goal is to integrate all of our messy,
beautiful parts. What parts are you looking to integrate now? The energy vibrates higher
when we align the differing parts of ourselves. All becomes one.
I want to share with you “The Four Stages of Personal Power” which is highlighted in
Caroline Myss’s book, Anatomy of the Spirit: The Seven Stages of Power and Healing.
Caroline is one of the great mystics of our time, a medical intuitive who believes we can
train ourselves to be intuitive and energetically clear. She says, “We have to work to
discover ourselves, to understand why we keep secrets, or have addictions, or blame
others for our own errors.”
The four stages are Revolution, Involution, Positive Narcissism, and Evolution, all leading to
a higher Self-Esteem, a clear Personal Power. In my Energy Medicine classes at Swan River,
we often reference our choice as our superpower. The small choices, the big choices, the
confidence that comes in choosing.
First, I want to ask you to think of something happening in your life right now, or recently,
that feels as if you are separating from group thought, as if you are experiencing courage to
stand one’s ground, even though it may go against your tribe or how you are expected to
be. This is stage one, Revolution. This can be grandiose or miniscule, however both are
spiritually significant. It can look like sobriety, choosing health, going to therapy, leaving a
relationship, or something like “I don’t like king cake!” when everyone else is obviously
obsessed. When I witness this in my practice, I would describe it as a “lightbulb moment”,
or that moment when someone has a spiritual realization that they will not ever be able to
“un-think.” These revolutions seem to be ample after the Christmas holidays and Mardi
Gras after we have been faced with the demands and the inherent values of our families
and communities. When our boundaries are pressed, we do not need to engage in conflict;
but we do need to take a step back and look at what we are energetically holding on to that
is no longer serving us.
Second, imagine taking this newfound information with you that says “whoa, I am different”
and moving on to what Caroline calls “the involutionary period.” If I actually don’t like king
cake, then what the heck do I like? Why have I been pretending? This can invoke fear in
people initially (insert referenced shame cycle above); but if steadfast in the self-discovery,
this shedding of energy becomes insight & direction. This stage is deeply personal and
introspective. It is the reflection period. If I am not that, then I am…?
Third, there is Positive Narcissism, my personal favorite. Narcissism is a trendy diagnosis
these days. We have to remember that all energy has a light and a dark side. Popular media
highlights the shadow side of narcissism;, but here, Caroline encourages us to indulge our
newfound parts in the act of positive narcissism. If I do not like king cake, and through
Involution, I discovered I do not like even being around king cakes, then I am now at this
vulnerable place in my life where I have to choose myself! She states:
“While we are in this vulnerable stage, we may get major critical reactions from our
tribal or group associates, but narcissistic energy gives us the backbone to re-create
ourselves and our boundaries in the face of opposition. The changes in this stage prepare
us for the more significant internal changes to follow.”
This is where we begin to try out new behaviors, express ourselves more authentically,
state our needs more clearly with kindness. Clients and students of mine would tell you
that I talk about this a lot from an energetic perspective. Once you begin using energy
hygiene daily to clear stagancies and cultivate clarity, you will surprise yourself with how
being who you want to be liberates your soul, how saying no-thank- you with confidence,
loud and proud, may feel better than you ever imagined.
The initial kick-off of a new practice, a psychic shedding, or the unmasking of a part of
yourself you had been hiding previously is often the hardest part; but through this positive
narcissism, there is an immediate shift into a more internal sense of what Caroline calls the
fourth stage, Evolution. She gives the example of how Mother Theresa’s vision of service to
the poor was too intense for many, that she was even seen as self-absorbed in her mission.
Through her own personal reflection, she acted from a place of courage and divine
guidance, no longer concerned with others’ critical responses. When you reach this stage,
your own authentic spirit is so strong that it changes your electromagnetic signature in the
world. One minute, you are bashfully announcing you do not like king cake, the next you
are wholeheartedly rejecting all sugary cakes against everyone’s judgment, and then you
are leading the charge for all the other quieted souls who also have abandoned themselves
amidst group thought. She states, “As your own spirit takes command, the world will yield
to its force.” All becomes one.
The Practice:
I want to challenge you to notice where you are holding on to values, behaviors, likes and
dislikes. If you imagine all the costumes and masks that you wore during the Mardi Gras
season, then imagine all the costumes and masks and hats that you wear in your everyday
life, can you sit quietly and decide what needs purging? What feels powerful?
Can you look past your physical body at the space it is taking up in the world and ask where
your energy is plugged in and if that plug is still serving you? Are these plugs nourishing
you at this point in your life? Have you kept some energetic cords plugged in for pleasing
others, or because you are supposed to? Are you ready to practice some Positive
Narcissism and let people be uncomfortable? Are you slightly excited at the prospect of
this growth during your next season of life? Can you have some faith in your future Self and
how liberated they will feel? Do you even like king cake? I do.
One of my favorite energy hygiene rituals is to open the curtains in my bedroom every
morning, root my feet for 30 seconds, give gratitude for another day, and ask myself, “what
does my energy need today? How can I stay in my power?” If you are quiet, there is always
a message from your spirit. Then, honor the message you receive. My partner now knows
I’m “off” if I never opened our curtained windows that day.
Our intuitive clear voice is always there. It is much quieter than fear voices. A few simple
practices to quiet your fear voices:
1. Place three fingers on top of your lip. They rest nicely in the grooves between your
nose and lip. Place the palm of your other hand on the bottom of your skull. Imagine
a line of energy moving from palm to palm, and breathe slowly for at least one
minute. This is helpful for neurological regulation and can calm the louder voices.
2. Use the middle fingers of both hands. Place one in your belly button and one in the
middle of your forehead. Gently push in and upward on your skin imagining a line
between these two points. Breathe for at least 30 seconds. This is called the Hook
Up, by Energy Practitioner Donna Eden. This brings two major energy channels into
balance. People often report feeling more in control or clear-headed. In doing this,
you may find new intuitive messages sharing with you where you may be depleting
energy.
Quotes:
“That is the meaning of detachment: the realization that no one person or group of people
can determine your life’s path.” – Caroline Myss, PhD
“The only way we can change our lives is to change our energy – to change the
electromagnetic field we are constantly broadcasting. In other words, to change our state
of being, we have to change how we think and how we feel.” – Dr. Joe Dispenza, author &
researcher of quantum theory
“We all wear masks, and the time comes when we cannot remove them without removing
some of our own skin.” – Andre Berthiaume, Canadian short story author
″For those who want something to hold on to, life is even more inconvenient.″ – Pema
Chodron, Tibetan-Buddhist nun & Spiritual Leader